manner ceremonial occasions manners in japan
japanese manner japanese version Japanese version
HOME HOME(English)
Alphabetical order
chugen Chugen
-(or Ochugen)
-Midyear present
funeral Funeral
miai Miai
 -(or Omiai)
-Meeting for marriage
nakoudo Nakoudo
-matchmaker
seibo Seibo
 -(or Oseibo)
-Year-end gift
wedding Wedding
yuinou Yuinou
-Betrothal presents
{ad-left}
The Nakoudo (go-between) is a mianing of person who contract a marriage of both houses.
(1)The go-between has the following roles.
　 1) The presence of the will to marry is confirmed about each man and woman.

2) The go-between checks each man and woman's economic conditions.

3) The go-between checks each man and woman's health conditions.

4) The go-between hears the hope matters about the marriage from each man and woman.

5) They ingroduces the candidate to the man and woman who is hoping for the meeting with a view to marriage.

6) When the mutual agreement of both houses is obtained, the go-between arranges the place and the time of the meeting.

7) On that day of the meeting with a view to marriage, the go-between introduces each man and woman, and matchmaker leads the meeting.

8) When the will to marry can be confirmed after the meeting of both man and woman, the matchmaker does acting as go-between of the wedding.

9)Thus, this married couple and go-between's association will continue through life.
(2)The traditional flow of the ceremony of meeting with a view to marriage is as follows.

1) First, you should request to the go-between to introduce the marriage proposal.

2) You have to prepare "Picture taked to be given to a matchmaker", "Personal information form" and "Personal history".

3) The above-mentioned is entrusted to the go-between.

4) The go-between brings the marriage proposal to you.

5) You must answer the go-between about whether you actually meet the other party.

6) You meet the other party on that day of the meeting with a view to marriage.

7) You must answer the go-between whether to associate with the other party, thinking about marriage in the future.
　
(3) We explain the flow of the day of the meeting with a view to marriage.
　 3-1. By what clothes do I have to attend?
The man puts on the suit and the shirt.
The woman puts on the suit and the dress, etc.
If the woman puts on Japanese clothes, she shold not become gorgeous by thinking about the balance with the other party .
　

3-2. The flow is as follows.

We think that you should arrive at the hall 20 or 30 minutes before tha start time.

When the other party enters the hall, you should welcome them by standing up.

The go-between directs tha place where each member sits.

First of all, the go-between introduces the soman side to the man side. Next, the man side are introduced to the woman side.

The go-between finds a common topic of the leading part's man and woman, and leads the conversation.

When two people become a little friendly to each other, the go-between makes the time to spend only by two people.
　
(4) The answer will be told to the go-between within one week.
　 The go-between tells each answer to both houses.
And the matchmaker plays an important role to watch the association of two people in the future.